Slow Steps

It's a slow process, this whole simplifying, decluttering, minimalist thing.  Life still happens, and my time is limited. 

I count every step forward as success.

Yesterday was a rough day.  It wasn't one thing, but a combination of things that lead to a day where I felt like nothing could go right.  I still managed to fill a box with random items from around the living room, and completely organize a desk drawer.  It's one box.  It's one drawer.  It's one thing at a time, but it is still progress.  

I tend to look at life as a journey.  The projects I take on are part of that journey. I finished up both the Be More With Less Devotional as well as the Be More With Less book, both by Joshua Becker of Becoming Minimalist.  It was encouraging to spend the first part of the year focusing on why intentionally simplifying and minimizing stuff leads to a more full, complete life.

I have this picture in my dining room that had been my grandmother's before she passed.  It's a well-known verse.  But, while studying and implementing minimalism, this verse suddenly took on new meaning.

This is the day which the Lord has made; we will rejoice and be glad in it.  Psalm 118:24

Of course, I can hear the hymn that uses these words, and I sing them.  As I declutter, I realize that stuff is way too often the reason we rejoice.  It is human nature to acquire, often selfishly.  Too often, we rejoice at new purchases.  

Last year I worked for a tax firm during tax time.  It was only a few weeks, during the peak season, and I only answered phones, made appointments, and checked people in for their appointments.  However, I saw a lot of people desperate for their tax refunds.  A large group was using that money to help themselves out of financial difficulties.  So many, however, simply wanted to use the funds to buy stuff; That new big screen tv, those new clothes, the electronics...  stuff. According to Consumer Research, "Of the consumers who view their tax refund as a bonus, 53% plan to make some sort of purchase with their refund money. "

I am not one to judge others for how they decide to allocate tax refund money.  My husband and I tend to plan major purchases for tax time also.  We purchase our homeschool curriculum for the following school year with our refund.  We also often purchase things we put off, like needed clothes for my husband and me, or expensive car repairs.  Like many others, my husband and I purposely claim less dependents throughout the school year so that more taxes are taken out at each pay period and we can receive a larger refund.  We tend to look at it as a way to save money without the temptation to spend the savings, because we only have access to the funds once a year.

Rejoicing in stuff has been a way of life. It's a rush, receiving that refund.  The rush continues when we purchase stuff.  When curriculum comes in, the excitement compares to Christmas morning as a child for me. It is like, for a brief period, I can fill a void that forms after feeling broke the rest of the year.  

This year, however, feels different.  Yes, there is homeschool curriculum purchases that will be made.  The list is much smaller this year  as I apply some minimalistic principles to our homeschooling. I just don't have the desire to spend thousands on books and workbooks and expensive materials.  I have a list of needs, not wants. 

I also have no desire to clutter up my home with tons of stuff.  I don't need it.  My mind is changing, renewing, as I read more and more, and study God's Word on this issue.  David Platt explains so expertly in his book, Radical: Taking Back Your Faith From the American Dream, the following:

"No teachers (including Jesus) in the New Testament ever promised material wealth as a reward for obedience. As if this were not starling enough to first-century Jews (and twenty-first century American Christians), we also see no verse in the New Testament where His people are ever again commanded to build a majestic place of worship.  And their possessions are to be spent on building, not a place where people can come to see God's glory, but a people who are taking Gid's glory to the world.

Isn't the hidden assumption among many Christians in our culture that if we follow God, things will go well for us materially?  Such thinking is explicit in 'health and wealth' teaching, and it is implicit in the lives of Christians whose use of possessions looks virtually the same as that of our non-Christian neighbors."

And so, one box at a time, I load up possessions to donate to those that might have more use for them.  One drawer at a time, I declutter.  And slowly, with each pay check, I consider what is a need and what is a want.  And, as tax refund season looms ahead, I make mental and physica preparations on where my money should go.  It won't be on a bunch of stuff...  this I know.

My husband and I live on a small income, especially compared to many around us.  We can't compete with those that make triple our income and live with a couple car payments and a large mortgage.  We don't have those burdens because we can't afford them.  Maybe that is a true blessing.  We live with less, because we can't afford what most Americans see as normal.  I used to feel that we were not as blessed as others because we didn't have as much income or material possessions.  We didn't have the ability to go out to eat often or buy the newest or best of anything.  We live paycheck to paycheck, and struggle. Every time my husband and I tried to get what we assumed we should have because it was what everyone else seemed to have, bam...  our struggle became so much worse.  Often, the desperation for more turned into a nightmare.  

I think now, however, that this working class living is God's   blessing.  And as I free myself from the burden of things, I find myself excited for the adventures that await, knowing God has a bigger purpose than a life of desperate envy and the insatiable pursuit of possessions. 

Yes, you read that right. When God called me to stay home and homeschool my children, He knew it would mean our lifestyle would be financially limited and that was part of His GOOD plan. Our struggles, our desperation when we couldn't pay the bills, our anger as two vehicles in two years had the transmissions go out,  our grief when we discovered our house was full of mold and making us sick, our frustration with having to start over in a small apartment, all of it is good. It is good because it led my husband and me to this place of realization that we have been striving for a lifestyle that God didn't tell us to live.  It is good because it has shown us the desperation in ourselves for selfish gain, and we see it all around us, and have learned that we don't want to feel that desperation any longer. 

There is a war going on in the spiritual realm, and the war often is God versus materialism.

David Platt explains it this way:

"The lesson I learned is that the war against materialism in our hearts is exactly that: a war. It is a constant battle to resist the temptation to have more luxuries, to acquire more stuff, and to live more comfortably.  It requires a strong and steady resolve to live out the gospel in the middle of an American dream that identifies success as moving up the ladder, getting the bigger house, purchasing the more vet car, buying the better clothes, eating the finer food, and acquiring more things."

So as I fill one more box and declutter one more drawer, I am keeping in mind that this isn't a war simply about stuff.  This is a spiritual war.  We will continue to have possessions in our home, even though we purposely limit them so that our limited resources can go to where God leads, and not what we think will temporarily bring some sense of satisfaction that is fleeting.