This has been a hard weekend. On Friday, we went to the funeral for my father-in-law. That was so difficult, yet I wanted to celebrate the life of this wonderful man and be the support for my husband and his family.
After the funeral I went to Women's convention. Lisa Bevere was the speaker. She is just amazing. She is real and blunt and funny and can touch hearts. I needed to bask in the presence of the Lord, and get some things straight in my head and heart. I love my Lord. Sometimes I find it easier to focus on things of this world and not spend enough time with him. I let problems take over my world. I let people that hurt me have too much of my attention.
God has been leading me in a different direction for awhile now. He led me to homeschooling. He has me thinking about things that I never thought about before. I love that about Jesus. He doesn't let you stay stagnant for long as long as you are seeking him. He keeps you pressing forward in this spot and that. He lets you learn from things and grow, without guilt over wrong choices. Trust me, conviction and guilt are two totally separate things.
I feel like God is isolating me in some ways. Maybe he is isolating me for himself. I'm not sure. But I think that I need the time to focus on God and not on some things that have just ripped apart my emotions and people that feel like tearing others down is an option.
I know this is a season and not a choice that will last forever. I have placed my trust in people in some situations instead of God, and I've been burned. Now, grieving the loss of a man that touched my life and died too young, I just feel like I can't waste a bunch of time on the nonsense that certain others bring. And I don't want to see my children hurt by those people over and over.
I know I am not making much sense. This blog has nothing to do with homeschooling, yet I know my homeschooling will be impacted by the choices I make and the way I live. If I put Christ first, the education I give will be not just for the mind but for the soul.
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