Um.... NO!
First the vehicle that was paid off bill basically dies a painful but quick death. There is no reviving it without spending more than it is worth... knowing that it won't last long even if fixed. That means that the paid off bill is suddenly an expense again. Then, we were hit with a bill that we didn't plan, but that came about anyway through no fault of our own. Then, the utility company refigures the yearly budget plan, and increased our payment nearly 25%. Money that is supposed to be income doesn't show as it is supposed to. Some of the thought-out (and prayed over) homeschool curriculum isn't working for one child, and I realized that she needs something different... leading to an expense we didn't plan. Food prices continue to escalate, and no matter how much we cut back on everything, we just can't seem to make those dollars stretch to cover everything. I am disappointed in myself because I knew, deep down, that I should have been smarter, planned better. I knew that things might not turn out as we had hoped. I left no leeway for things to go bad. I know that was wrong, but after years of struggle, I just wanted things to go right for awhile.
This has been my last three months. Unfortunately, beating myself up isn't the answer. And, with the policies that our government is making, I don't believe deep down that things will improve. In fact, I know that inflation is almost a definite. Things won't become easier, because that makes no sense. If financial pressures land on my family because we relaxed too much for a brief period, then financial struggles are sure to fall on a government spending irresponsibly and way beyond their means.
So, I am in a place where I have to make some tough decisions... where I will have to sacrifice here and there until I get things back on track. It always takes a lot longer to get things on track than it does to get into trouble, so I imaging we'll be struggling for awhile to keep afloat. But I believe that, even in tough times, even when tough times are our fault, we can persevere and triumph with the Lord. He won't reward poor stewardship, but He will teach lessons and sustain me through the tough times.
As I look around at my life, I realize that I am tired of living stressed. I would rather do without than be stressed out in luxury. So, I seek ways to lower our bills, stretch every penny, and be faithful to God through it all.
I"m not alone either. I see friends and family that struggle, but hide it, or live with accumulating debt, not thinking about the future. It's easy to live either way. It's easy to want to live like everyone else is living, to have nice things, to confuse wants with needs.
After all, isn't having cell phones a necessity? Don't we need one for safety? What if our car breaks down? What if someone needs to get a hold of us while we aren't home? I looked at my cell phone company's selection of basic phones. They have three of them. The selection of smart phones number about thirty. They know that they will sell the phones that cost an extra $30 a month at least for internet access per phone line. They are raking in the dough, while introducing upgrade fees and trying to charge more for phones. Despite a stressed economy and still high unemployment, it seems everyone has a smart phone. It has become a "necessity" of sorts. No longer is the norm a family phone, but each individual member having their own number. Instant access to anyone, day or night, is no longer seen as a luxury, but as just the way it is.
A few years ago I was so happy to have unlimited long distance on my land line. No longer was I going to have to worry about high phone bills since everyone I knew was long distance. I realized recently that I am spending an average of $2400 a year on cell phone service for my husband, me, and our oldest teenager. The next teen in line is chomping at the bit to have a cell phone. Some of her friends already have smart phones, including our 11 year old neighbor! What will I have to give up to allow my child to have a basic phone? I surely can't afford a smart phone for her!
As I struggle to pay our utility bill and house payment, I realize that a cell phone argument seems silly. But this is how I see those around us living! Both parents are working full time. Children are sent to public schools that aren't safe, and then come home to empty houses, all so parents can afford smart phones for their nine year olds! Where we used to think it was important to not let a child have a computer in their bedroom for safety purposes, we now give them unlimited access to the internet unsupervised because that is what "everyone is doing". (And I am uncomfortable with the fact that every electronic transmission, whether it be text, phone call, email, facebook status, or blog post is being data mined by our government.)
Well... I'm not going to do what everyone else is doing. I stay home and homeschool my children. That comes with a cost. That cost is we don't get to have all the "stuff" everyone else seems to have. We have to live cheaply. We have to make do. We have to limit ourselves. It isn't fun, but it is important. I don't want to be behind on my bills. I don't want to be in debt. I don't want to be a slave to the bill collectors. I don't want to live stressed out, wondering how I will pay my bills, wondering if I will have to choose between gas money and food.
Before you think that I am alone... I assure you I am not. One only has to look around to see that many others struggle. I think tough times are supposed to teach us lessons. I didn't learn all the lessons I was supposed to, however. So, God is letting me repeat the test... again.
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